book-cover
LOVE or DIE
Zikora-Chidynma
Zikora-Chidynma
9 months ago

"It's not as bad as you think, babe," Tayo, or rather, Tee, my two-day-old boyfriend shrugged as he wrapped another bunch of dried leaves in a thin brown paper. It was the fourth wrap and he still had some dried leaves left in the transparent plastic.

"But Tee, four wraps is too much na," I complained bitterly.

I was a well brought up lady and an only child from a decent family and if one told me I would be dating the university's bad boy, I would have hurled sufficient amount of insults in the person's face. But love happened and I couldn't stop myself from yielding to its strong hold.

Tayo was surprisingly the most intelligent guy in his department and permit me to add, the cutest. His charming dark glowing eyes, perfect dimple on his left cheek which lights up his face when he smiles and his well-placed dentition got girls tripping left and right. Not to mention his 6ft, beautifully muscled body.

But once a bad boy, always a bad boy.

Tayo was very popular for his flirtatious ways and knowing the right kinds of strong liquor to mix together. His smoking was just on another level. But I couldn't do it. I couldn't stay away from him and now that he agreed to be in a relationship with me, I was ready to endure, and if possible, modify myself to suit his taste.

Tee smiled and I could only stare at his dimple like a hopeless romantic, "You're right though. Four wraps is too much, that's why you'll be having one of it."

My heart contracted, ready to slam against the walls of my chest, "But Tee...." I tried wanting out but he brought his finger to my lips, shutting me up.

"No buts Temi, I'll show you how. Just trust me and the process." That did it, my heart freed itself slamming hard against my chest wall. Soon it formed a rhythm faster than normal and my body trembled.

'Temi you shouldn't be doing this.' The voices in my head started again.

'Abegi, she wouldn't be the first neither would she be the last. Allow her enjoy her life o jaree.'

'Shut up please. Temi don't listen to her. Tell him you can't do it. If he doesn't want you because of that, then he doesn't deserve you.'

'Temi, don't forget you had to chase him for a year before he accepted you. Don't let this idiot ruin what you worked so hard for.'

"Can you just leave me alone?!" I yelled subconsciously, holding my ears shut, tired of hearing the voices.

"Babe, is everything alright?" Tee asked, concern and surprise evident in his voice. I looked up at him confused. "You were yelling."

"I.. I... Sorry, it was a mistake."

"Are you sure there's nothing?" I nodded in reply. "Alright," his smile returned as he handed me a wrap of the Arizona, "Sooo.... Let the fun begin."

He picked up a wrap and placed it in his mouth. Using a cigarette lighter, he lit up the wrap and dragged a large amount in before letting out the puff slowly through his nose and then his mouth.

"Easy, isn't it?" He grinned and I smiled nervously. He stretched the cigarette lighter to me, "Here, give it a shot."

But I don't want to.

I couldn't possibly say that. But on a second thought, it might not be as bad as they make it seem.

I gathered all the confidence I could from within and took the cigarette lighter from his hand. Imitating his actions, I placed the wrap in my mouth and the first thing that ticket me of was the smell. It was really weird.

'What if you're not so lucky with this thing, Temi?' the voice came again but I shut it out instantly and lit up my own wrap.

"Yeah, that's it Temi. Now slowly drag it in. Slowly o. I don't want you to die from cough." My eyes found his immediately and he could see that I was startled. He laughed, "Calm down na, I was just joking. Listen, just do as I say."

I nodded and proceeded to take the first drag as slow as possible. But immediately the bad air got into my lungs, I bursted into a fit of cough. Tee's hand found my back immediately, massaging it not so gently.

"Sorry. I told you to take it slowly na," he whined.

"But. I did. Just. That," I said in between coughs. I started hitting my chest lightly trying to stop whatever was making me cough but it only worsened.

God, what have I gotten myself into?

Tears began to escape from my eyes due to the excessive coughing. Tayo hurried to the kitchen and came back with a glass of water in his hands.

"Temi drink this," he handed it over to me still patting my back.

I was disappointed again. The water only made my chest hurt. Before I could hand the glass cup back to Tee, it left my shaky hands and hit the tiled floor hard.

"Jesus," I cried, "Tayo I'm dying. Tayo my chest." My breathing wasn't normal anymore and I was now crying for real. The whistling sounds my chest was producing on expiration wasn't so unheard.

But I thought I was cured.

I couldn't suck in breath anymore.

"Ta.. Tayo... I. I can't breathe."

My head was spinning. I could see Tayo's mouth moving but I could hear anything. He was spinning too.

Jesus, please save me. Just this once.

The whistling sounds only increased. I was wheezing for heaven's sake!

I continued struggling for air, but I just couldn't find it anywhere. I was loosing myself slowly. Tears dropped from my eyes as I watched confused Tayo do nothing but press down on my chest. Was that supposed to be a form of resuscitation or what?!

A simple 'No' would suffice. If only time could be reversed.

I simply submitted to my fate, welcoming the darkness that took over my whole being.

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