There was nothing spectacular about Keme. She was average across all fronts, from her looks to her body and brains. This wasn’t a bad thing because she had accepted this fact. She wasn’t bad, she was just okay.

Keme wanted love, for as long as she could remember she dreamed of full love but a part of her believed she would never get it. The love that existed in romance novels, the whole hearted love where a man would choose her and stay was not something she could imagine for herself so instead of chasing an impossibility she became comfortable being by the side.

Men loved Keme, though never enough to commit. While this arrangement was enough for some people and they genuinely didn’t want commitment, Keme wanted more. At first she would get into situationship hoping it would develop into something more but it never happened. She was always left alone after a few hookups, only remembered when they were horny.

She didn’t know how it happened, but after a few heart breaks she began to seek out men who were in relationships. At first she told herself it was a mistake, she lied to herself that she hadn’t seen the signs but the truth was she liked the safety of the sidelines. 

It was much simpler this way, she knew not to expect anything from them, there was no expectation from each other. They had their person and she was just the object of desire. She didn’t want a real relationship with them anyway. This worked best for her, it kept her hopes low, a man that wasn’t hers was not going to disappoint her, she loved being the one at the side, the hidden secret, the person in on the joke. 

She loved being on the side until she didn’t. The problem was that Keme always falls. She fell for the man and even though she tried to crush the hope of something more, it lingered in her mind and she hoped that the man would pick her over his partner. That he would choose to continue whatever they started. That she would become special in his eyes and no longer be just a body.

At the core of it, Keme had deluded herself that if she was picked above another girl, then she’d become more, better, worth it. Yet all she got was a variation of sex styles and an empty heart